What You Can Do When Your Emotions Take Over

When you notice that your emotions take over, stop and take a deep breath. We have all experienced that feeling in the middle of an argument about something or when anxiety takes control of us. These emotional kidnappings are devastating. However, we always have tools at our disposal to help us maintain control over ourselves.

It is possible that we know this type of situation too well. Some people are more prone to emotional overload. Others, on the other hand, rely on their strong self-control. They manage their self-control by dealing with each of these “emotional threats”. But usually neither of these two strategies leads to the best results.

The impressions of these complex emotional universes will remain there, on the surface, depriving us of our peace and balance. That is why we always see patients who come for a consultation, who put the blame on their shortcomings and shortcomings. They say things like “The problem is my terrible anxiety”, “I do not know what to do with my anger” or “I have problems with my emotions. I do not know what to do to live a normal life ”.

These types of statements show us once again that there is a bias in our society regarding these issues. We continue to think that emotions are somehow bad, that there is no reason for us to feel anxiety. We believe that life without having to live in the shadow of fear would be a life with greater meaning. However, we tend to forget that these emotions always have a clear purpose for our survival and adaptation.

Knowing, accepting and managing when emotions take over helps you to avoid the recurring emotional floods.

If emotions take over at some point, look at the horizon and keep your eyes there for a while. Let the world go through its movements, let the discussion complete its course in whatever direction it goes.

Allow all the scary stimuli you can feel to pass into the past, trapped in a harmless dimension where they can not harm you. Focus your gaze on the imagined peaceful horizon. Do this to give your mind and body a few seconds to regulate your breathing, your heartbeat and the tension you are experiencing.

The best thing you can do when chaos pours down like rain on your life is to stay calm. When we as humans experience emotional floods, panic takes over our brains. It is reasonable for it to do so, because panic stems from the most instinctive part of our brain.

In these moments, everything is chaotic, messy and intense. In these situations, the prefrontal cortex, which is associated with our analytical ability as well as decision-making and logical reasoning, becomes “disconnected”. Let’s take a look at how this complex process works.

Amygdala and the direct journey to fear and anger

When emotions take over, you can go from peace to panic, anger or fear in just five seconds. How can this be done? What mechanism within us can take control so quickly? We have all asked ourselves this question at some point in our lives. The answer is as fascinating as it is disturbing: the amygdala is responsible for all this.

A study conducted at Emory University in Atlanta and published in the Journal of Biological Psychiatry showed that the amygdala modulates all our fear, stress or aggression and the behaviors related to these emotions. The study showed, for example, that the small structure is the one responsible for collecting information from our environment that may be related to threats around us. The amygdala also causes us to react with a very specific purpose in mind: to survive.

When unregulated emotions take control

People who develop emotional disorders are mainly characterized by something very specific: they can not or do not succeed in regulating when their emotions take over completely. This situation creates even more anxiety for them over time. They begin to feel helpless and as if everything around them is beyond their control. Therefore, we must be clear: the emotions that we do not regulate today will overwhelm us tomorrow. If this situation becomes chronic, conditions such as generalized anxiety disorder and depression can occur.

We should also take into account that in these situations it is useless to suppress emotions or block thoughts. The classic idea “I’m just not going to think about it” does not help us at all. It can actually generate more blockages and problems in both the short and long term.

What strategy should we use when emotions take over? In psychological contexts, we often use the phrase “emotional control”. Instead of “control”, it would be more accurate of us to use the term “regulation”, thanks to the flexibility and dynamics that this word gives us.

Somehow control is the main actor here. Think of strength and dominance. In this case and in the emotional sphere, we should leave resistance behind. We must choose acceptance, management, flexibility, transformation and movement.

Let’s take a look at what strategies we should apply in these situations:

• A study published in the journal Frontiers in Psychology noted that emotional regulation is not a one-size-fits-all solution. This means that there is no single strategy that works for every situation and circumstance. Anxiety that arises before a test, a discussion, or having to accept a separation or a loss, will cause us to start implementing coping strategies.
• On the other hand, emotions are always there for a reason, and we must ask ourselves what the emotions want from us. What is their purpose? Raising our gaze away to the horizon is therefore always a useful strategy in the most alarming state. This allows us to enter our mental palace and find ourselves. Once we are there, we should ask ourselves what is happening and why it is happening.

• We need to address another relevant factor. The amygdala is the sentry that in most cases decides to mobilize fear or anger before we consciously think about it. It acts on instinct rather than logic. When it does, it takes control of our body and triggers all the symptoms we are so familiar with as tachycardia, dizziness and sweating.
  

Deep breaths

When emotions take over, it does not help to say to ourselves “Calm down, nothing will happen”. Because, in fact, something is actually happening in our brain. Therefore, in these moments, it is most appropriate to calm our body with deep breaths. Inhaling deeply and exhaling slowly helps us regulate our heartbeat and relieve muscle tension. When the body is balanced, we can then manage our thoughts and take a closer look at how and why we feel the way we do.