Do You Know How Perverse Communication Works?
To destabilize an individual, you do not have to create a direct conflict or exercise physical violence. The use of irony, mockery or insinuations is part of a form of communication among fellow human beings where a party is injured. We’re talking about perverted communication. It can happen to a couple, between friends or at work.
Perverse communication refers to psychological torture against a fellow human being. It makes no noise, but nevertheless destabilizes and confuses the individual it is directed at. All this can begin with a simple disrespectful act, of course without the guilt of the person performing it.
In order to exercise this type of communication , it is sufficient for an individual to tease a fellow human being for his or her personal taste, achievements or expectations, both privately and among people. It is also common for the practitioner to deny the other person the chance to express himself, or to make insinuations about the person without later clarifying them.
Irony and teasing are two weapons that this type of communication uses and that will establish relationships. Initially , this attitude may give the impression of a strong individual because it pretends to be “someone who knows what he or she is doing”.
This leads to the collective belief that this person is “just like that”. Deep down, it creates an unpleasant atmosphere that is not recommended in all the areas of the person’s life to which this attitude extends. An attitude which in turn contributes to the fact that he can never create spaces of total sincerity and intimate communication.
Sarcasm and mild contempt are used as small, soft blows that disturb the other person. Kinds that often happen in front of other people. Furthermore, the perpetrator tends to rely on the reinforcement and support of an accomplice who is part of his social circle. The aggression is so insidious that the recipient may even doubt whether it is sincere or just a joke he should accept.
These actions are so common that they seem normal. They begin with a simple disrespectful act, but it leads to continuous attacks that will have important consequences for the victim’s psychological health.
It is about something cryptic that is part of our daily lives. The victims begin to accept it, and it ends up elevating these people, convinced that it is better to be with them than against them. This leads to an authentic distortion of the relationship between the two parties.
Marie-France Irigoyen talks about this form of violence. The type that starts in secret and gradually gets worse, and where the people who are injured do not react to go on the counterattack. Instead , they display the kind of attitude that most nurtures hidden aggression: excessive kindness. They think that if they can make the person like them a little more, they will eventually become kind.
Let us not forget that if the wounded person at some point decides to rebel, the “superior being” will make sure to stop him. The bully will prevent any ability to think critically and cause the victim to lose sight of their own identity.
People who are insecure about themselves are more susceptible to being caught by manipulators. This type of person puts the opinions of others before their own. They believe that others always know more about all subjects.
After all we have explained, which individual do you consider to be the one who is really insecure: the one who is being manipulated or the one who needs to manipulate others in order to feel strong in everyday situations? Therefore, we now emphasize the need to educate children to respect others at a very young age, and not to use perverse communication. We must understand that each individual is unique and irreplaceable, and that one should not be a threat to one’s fellow human beings.
You have the same value as all the other people around you (neither more nor less). Keep your head high wherever you go. For your physique, your opinions, your aspirations and your goals are worth appreciating.
