How To Give Someone Bad News

How to give someone bad news

It seems that bad news is becoming more common. Sometimes they come suddenly and other times it feels like we knew it would happen sooner or later. An example of this is the loss of a close relative who has suffered from a serious illness. Although it may hurt, it feels easier to notify someone about the death in such cases.

In other situations  , the death of a loved one may be completely unexpected, and you simply have no idea how to tell someone. An accident, an assault or a natural disaster in which your worldview collapses in a fraction of a second. In an instant, a very important person passes away.

Even if no one wants to experience this situation, the truth is that this is unfortunately how life works. The problem is how to handle these situations and how to best tell others about what has happened. Keep reading to learn how to give someone bad news.

Giving someone bad news is very difficult. In addition to going through a difficult time, it undoubtedly ends with us feeling bad. Not only because of our own feelings towards the deceased, but  also because we are worried about how those we have to share the bad news with will react.

We’re afraid of hurting them. Even though we try to give them the news in the best possible way, it still worries us. Plus you never know how they will react. They may blame what has happened to us or treat us badly. It depends entirely on the individual’s ability to handle the situation. As messengers, we should not take the reactions personally.

Woman in grief

On the other hand, we rarely have enough information in these situations. And  it is normal for one of the relatives of the deceased to have an endless amount of questions for you. That’s why we’re afraid of not knowing what to say. But the truth is that we are human and do not always have answers to all questions. Even less so when unexpected tragedies occur.

One way to deal with these negative emotions that may arise and to try to reduce them as much as possible for the recipient, is to prepare yourself to give someone the bad news before doing so. The first step is to try to gather as much information as possible about what happened. This way you will be able to answer most questions.

You also need to know who to tell. It is not the same to prepare a message for children of the deceased as for the parents, friends or a married half. Although it may not seem important, in this way you can be more capable of sitting in their seat. You will be better able to adapt your language to each person you have to meet the conditions.

Then  you need to think about what is a good place to convey the sad news. It may seem obvious but it is worth keeping in mind that it is good to have as private a place as possible. Last but not least, it is extremely important  that you are mentally prepared for what to say and how to say it. This way you avoid saying something inappropriate that risks increasing the other person’s pain.

When you have made all the preparations, the moment of truth has now come. What you say will not get the dead back but you can minimize the pain of the loved one as far as possible.  To be able to do that, the information you give them must be very clear and you must be absolutely sure that it is true. If not, you can confuse your listener and create even more negative emotions.

To follow this intention  , you should tell them what happened gradually. For example: “A collision occurred and your husband received some very serious injuries. The ambulance that came to the scene tried to revive him but did not succeed. I’m terribly sorry to say that, but Peter is dead. ”

You must name the person who died by name, as well as  use expressions that directly refer to death, so that what happened is clear and distinct. If the person has any questions, they must feel that they can interrupt you and ask them. They must feel that you have empathy for them and that you are doing your best to support them in such difficult circumstances…

As you can see  , it is neither easy nor convenient to give someone bad news. There is nothing that anyone ever wants to do. Still, it is important to know how to do it to make others understand what has happened. You need to be sensitive, confident and, above all, empathetic  in order to withstand the suffering of the person receiving the news.

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