Echoism: About Fragmented Self-esteem

Echoism is named after the Greek myth of Narcissus and Echo. Echo was a mountain nymph punished by Hera and had to repeat the last words of every conversation she heard. Today, this mythological figure symbolizes all the people who struggle daily to make themselves heard. In many cases, the biggest obstacle for them is a close narcissist.

One of the newest terms in psychology is echoism. The term may make you think of something that has to do with hearing or auditory problems. However, it comes from the nymph from Mount Helikon who was in love with a beautiful shepherd boy named Narkissos.

Dr. Craig Malkin, a professor of psychology at Harvard Medical School, was the first to introduce the term echoism in his book  Rethinking Narcissism: The Secret to Recognizing and Coping with Narcissists. Since the book was published, the scientific community, as well as the general public, have developed a great deal of interest in this new personality disorder.

Echoism describes a person who is very dependent on others and who often has unhealthy relationships with narcissists. They are often loving, affectionate and emotional people who are uncomfortable being in the center. They are afraid to express their needs. People with echoism prioritize other people’s needs and desires. They tend to be passive and not certainly forthright because of the narcissist in their immediate social sphere.

In the coming years, you will probably hear this term more and more. The public is interested in echoism because of how narcissism is clearly present in today’s society. In fact, studies conducted by researchers at Ruhr University Bochum in Germany at the  Public Library of Science  show that social networks such as Facebook make this disorder much more common.

As a result, there are many more people who feel influenced by narcissists on a daily basis. The presence of a narcissist limits their identity and, above all, their self-esteem. If, on the other hand, you take a closer look at Echo’s history, you will discover something unique. Echo was the most forthright and brilliant interlocutor. Everyone she talked to trollbands during her conversations because of her amazing percussion skills.

Her talent made Zeus use her to entertain Hera when he slipped away to be unfaithful to other women. When Hera found out, she punished Echo by saying her voice. The only thing she could do was repeat the last words of everyone else’s conversation. Echo’s torture was exacerbated when she fell in love with Narcissus, who made fun of her because of the curse.

When this happened, Echo fell into deep hopelessness and sadness. The rejection and humiliation was worse than losing his voice. Echoism embodies this basic idea. You have been a strong and powerful person before. Regardless of this, the simple fact that the presence of a narcissist has the total power to completely undo you. You hide and find shelter in a dark mountain cave on Helikon just like Echo.

Echoism does not just mean low self-esteem or addiction. It’s more complex than that.

• People with this disorder are very emotionally sensitive.

• They know how to listen to others and are very empathetic. However, they are not comfortable or confident enough to express their needs to others.
• Those who suffer from this disorder do not appreciate their own worth, and they hardly acknowledge their own successes.
• They do not take the initiative because they do not want to bother other people. They shut down projects that show the slightest indication that they would cause problems for someone else.
• These people usually have a narcissistic parent. One or both actively neglected (or actively rejected) their emotional and personal needs.
• It is worth mentioning that people with echoism understand and are aware of their problem. They have several internal conflicts. They try to make themselves heard, set boundaries, clarify their needs, and so on. However, they do not always reach their goals, which creates constant internal conflicts.

• At the same time , people with echoism often have emotional relationships with narcissists. These personality types feed each other. However, neither party is satisfied with the relationship.

This is not really a psychological condition. Echoism is a trait based on some unfortunate survival mechanisms.

It comes from having an insecure connection during childhood. The narcissist in the child’s life buried pretty much all of their emotional needs. Slowly but surely, the child has learned not to sue, to live in silence and not to bother anyone. They have learned that they are a character that other narcissists use and manipulate.

Everyone can get out of their personal caves. Echo, for example, used Nemesis and asked her for revenge. However, it does not have to go to such extremes. Punishing Narcissus did not make Echo regain the gift of speech.

Working on your self-esteem is all you should focus on. Understand that you deserve to be seen, have a voice, express your needs and receive affection from others. Sometimes it’s not a bad idea to take a leaf from Narcissus’ book and look at your own reflection to remind yourself of how valuable you are.